Why I May Never Be a Diamond doTERRA Leader

I had the privilege of attending a training with one of my brilliant upline leaders earlier this summer and learned the top 7 traits of all doTERRA Diamonds. The traits were written, one-by-one on the white board. And when I saw number 3, my throat choked up.

The average monthly income of a Diamond in 2016, by the way, was $16,733 – so its definitely a good thing to have on your vision board. It’s been on mine since this journey all started for me in March. There were 469 total Diamonds across the globe in 2016,  and that number only continues to rise. Not to mention their are ranks higher than that, and the income snowballs as the ranks grow. It’s a very real thing, I’m learning.

But, back to the list. The top 7 characteristics of all 469 doTERRA diamonds, here they were in plain sight:

Number 1: Woman. CHECK.  Of all essential oil users and certainly of all business builders, most are women for whatever reason. I’m ok with that.

Number 2: 30-45 years old. CHECK. I am officially halfway to 70, so we are good there, too!

Number 3: Supportive Spouse… we will come back to this one.

Number 4. Need for Money.  WELL, YES. Of course I have a need for money! I remember seeing this one and kind of tilting my head thinking, who doesn’t need money??? and then I realized…some people that “do doTERRA” and advance in rank are already financially stable and don’t really “need the money” — so if they were asked “is money a factor?” the answer could safely be no. For me, that’s just not the case. I gave up my income and career prior to doing this. Yes, that was my choice, and we have eliminated debt and several unnecessary expenses in order to find a little more wiggle in our budget. But of course we need the money. So, another SCORE on the list for me.

Number 5. Influencer. I’m starting to think that maybe I can influence others– whether I knew it, like it, think I deserve it, or believe it. But this blog alone has proven to me that my words matter. And that I can build a tribe of readers and brighten someones day from time to time. I’m down with that, 100% and will continue to find every ounce of joy in the process. It’s been fun to be the CEO of my own business. And no, I never felt called to “sell essential oils”, but I’m learning that my calling is serving and teaching and leading with the passionate fire I’ve got burning inside of me. Those who see my light will follow.  I’ve had a few people join me on this journey, so it’s safe to say we all influence each other in this business.

Number 6. Business Experience. CHECK. I managed roughly a half billion dollar asset in property management and a staff of a dozen people. I’ve written budgets and held team meetings and given performance reviews. Business was all I knew for a decade.

Number 7. Already Natural. CHECK. I’ve been using these products for almost 3 years. I get down with attachment parenting and try to feed my family organic and/or raw foods when I can. Sure, we don’t do it perfectly, but I am fully aware of the consequences associated with processed/GMO foods and try to avoid them when we can. I honestly just try to do the best I can with the resources we have each day.

But Number 3. Let’s revisit that one. Because the reality is, I’ve had this blog post drafted for two months, with a fear of releasing it into cyberspace. Fear of speaking the words into the universe that my husband does not support my essential oil business. There, I said it.

But I didn’t really want to post this for several reasons. All this work I’ve done on myself over the last few months has taught me the power of our words and that building a house in a dark place in our life is never a good idea. But, the truth is, my heart feels like I can’t be the only one that is struggling with this very same challenge, and that perhaps these words should be heard.

Someone, somewhere, at some rank in their business may echo my sentiment in believing the following: We must recognize the importance of supporting each other through this journey, because there is a good chance there isn’t support coming from much place else. 

Whether you are building a networking marketing business or not, words of encouragement are so vital. We’ve underestimated the value of personal touch, and hand-written notes and compliments. We’ve become too dependent on the external that we’ve missed what’s being brought up on the internal.

I’m noticing the impact that the negative energy in my home has on my motivation, my drive, my purpose. I feel my joy being sucked from me, and doubt and fear set in. But then I get a text from someone with an oil testimony and my eyes well with tears.

To feel your soul burning at the corners of your flesh that you are following your life path, and to feel stuck all at the same time. To have moments where you wonder if you’ve got it all wrong, and to pray for answers that have been missed if they’ve come at all.

Part of my morning routine has become to repeat affirmations, aloud. I remind myself daily: “Be not afraid of going slowly. Be only afraid of standing still.” And while my pace will likely never be fast enough to satisfy my own hunger, I refuse to stand still.  I know how (and am learning to know when) to be still. But I won’t stand still.

And to all of my fellow doTERRA people, know that your encouragement and stories and smiles and hugs and friendships are needed. And appreciated, more than you may know. Let us be bright lights for one another and lift each other up in a such a way, that it won’t matter if you’ve got Number 3 checked off or not, you can still be a Diamond anyway.

That’s my plan at least.

 

 

 

 

Salt Lake City: Here’s What Went Dōwn

I’ll try to do it in less than two thousand words, but I don’t think I can.

I attended some amazing conferences when I worked in property management. But what dōTERRA just pulled off was magical. Something magical happens anytime you put 30,000 like-minded people together I suppose. I’m still on a high from all the good vibes and energy. The people-hangover was real, and much like a normal hangover for me these days, it seems to get worse each day this week. I feel a little more drained each day, but my heart remains full from inspiration and my mind his racing with ideas for the direction I want my business to grow in. The kind of inspiration that comes up out of the nowhere and makes you cry. The kind that sets your soul on fire.

My aunt Leslie and I made the journey to Salt Lake together, as we are both only 6 months young to the business-building side of dōTERRA. We connected with others on our team and others on different teams. We were gifted with tokens of appreciation from our uplines and had the chance to talk and connect in deeper ways than ever before. We needed this time together, and though the sacrifices made to get there were real, we made it.

We were schooled with science talk. I absorbed information over a three-day period from a wealth of super-intelligent people, from all over the world. Oncologists and dermatologists and nurse practitioners and ER surgeons and botanists and yoga instructions/wounded warriors and family physicians and RNs. I heard from other leaders within the company, founding executives and customers/builders alike. I met Billy Blanks! Turns out his wife is a dōTERRA builder, too. And he was there to share in the same incredible experience I had the honor of having. I showed him my muscles and told him how much I loved my Tae Bo VHS tapes! He agreed to this selfie, and even took it for me. 

I was filled with joy for 5 days. And I’ve been dying a little inside to sit and write out this blog to tell you just a bit about what I learned.

For starters, the growth happening within dōTERRA right now is  insane. In the month of July alone, there were one million orders fulfilled. I placed one. You might have placed one. But combined there were one million. So, people are clearly using oils. We could assume they are being used in the home, or in the business, but what about in the healthcare industry???

Currently, our medical system functions on two different models:

  1. The 3rd party payer (aka the insurance company)
    1. Natural incentives could be integrated, but they are misaligned
  2. Fee for Service (aka Medicaid/Medicaire)
    1. Incentives provider to increase QUANTITY of care over QUALITY of care
    2. No incentive offered for holistic care

So, what would it look like if we could change that?

  • What if we could introduce elements of the free market system into healthcare?
  • What if we could include holistic and integrative medicine with allopathic medicine?
  • What if medical costs were transparent?
  • What if we could eliminate the middle-man (aka insurance), along with the ridiculous markups?
  • What if our medical care included an integrative approach, with ESSENTIAL OILS being one of the potential modalities?
  • What if doctors could determine the “Standard of Care” for their patients, rather than the 3rd party bureaucrats?
  • What if doctors could devote more time to their patients, rather than to the endless reports and coding required for insurance billing, and the required overhead to support it?
  • What if you could significantly lower your healthcare costs, and include more preventative medicine, all while making medical care more accessible?
  • What if there were a way for consumers to have easier and faster access to doctors they trust?

Well, there is, my friends. A change is coming. It’s already here.

dōTERRA has a vision to lower healthcare costs and improve patient outcomes, by integrating essential oils into the healthcare system. It’s already happening, ya’ll. The first clinic will open in Salt Lake City, Utah!

You can vote for a clinic in your city by going to healthcare.doterra.com. The website is already live.  Several partner clinic locations are underway and thousands of affiliate clinics will be made possible, by YOU asking. I’ve asked, and I can’t wait for this clinic to come to Greensboro.

What a breakthrough revolution this will be! I literally shed a tear as the information was being presented to me. To be a part of a movement so powerful at a time when there are literally millions of other people also fired up to share the message. I’ve personally watched people make small shifts in their lives, just in the last couple of months since being exposed to these beautiful oils (and products). I imagine a global revolution and it feels so damn good to be a part of it.

Our current healthcare system is broken, and it needs to be revisited. Think about it…

When do you go to the doctor?

When do you take medicine?

When do you go to the emergency room?

When something is WRONG? Right?!

So, what if we said that healthcare should start when there is something RIGHT with us? In our WHOLE BODY and MIND..?

I know what you may be thinking. A doctor’s office where they sell essential oils???

Nope. You’ll just get the doctor. And he/she may prescribe you to use the oils, but he will refer you to a Wellness Advocate, or to your own stash if you’ve already seen the light and made the jump to natural wellness. Maybe you just need him to tell you what oils to use because Pinterest isn’t cutting it. But the most liberating part of all,you will have an option other than a Z-Pack. And you won’t need to pay a co-pay, because there won’t be any insurance to file.

The life expectancy rate for people born in the United States has declined for the first time since the 1990s. That means, all of the sudden, the age at which we are predicted to die, is less than it used to be. Isn’t there something terribly wrong with this?…

70 percent of Americans are overweight or obese.

Of all babies born in 2015, 1 in 3 have a high probability of being diabetic later in life.

Of all the countries in the world, we are ranked 37th in overall healthcare system “performance”.

People are sick and tired of being sick and tired. People are waking up to their options. 

This collaboration between doctor and patients helps provide a better understanding of essential oils and how they work, integrates with modern medicine when needed (however its not unusual for the medicine to be phased out completely once the essential oil is introduced), and partners healthcare with other Wellness Advocates, just like me. Just like YOU.

Our voices have been heard. And to think it all likely started at Vanderbilt University when a nurse asked a restless patient if she could apply a drop of lavender to the bottom of his foot before surgery to calm him. He said yes, and so she did. That was the start of it for Vanderbilt, and they began studies that focused on stress in the workplace. Diffusing citrus oils significantly reduced the stress and anxiety of the nurses and led to less-stressed patients.

Patient blood pressure rates started to decrease. Linalool, found in high quantities in citrus oils, has been proven effective for reducing stress, likely due to lowering cortisol levels in the body.

Chief Nursing Officer at Vanderbilt University, Robin Steaban: “I think we have enough evidence. I think it’s time to take the steps toward changing our practice.” Now, the nurses at Vanderbilt are committed to diffusing at every nurses station. It made that significant of an impact on them, and their patients.

SO MUCH research has been done. And continues to be done.  So much collaboration is taking place. In fact, for the first time in history, just a couple of weeks ago, medical professionals from around the world teamed up with essential oil researchers, botanists and scientists alike for the first annual Essential Oil Medical Symposium.

And, not to mention, the newly-formed Aromatic Plant Research Center, located in none other than Winston-Salem (our back yard!). This will be yet another way for scientists and doctors from around the globe to get together, intentionally, to dig deeper into research. Adulterated essential oils are a big problem, unfortunately. Since not all essential oils are created equally, we need organizations like this one to be a light for accountability and purity.

I learned SO MUCH about how our Frankincense is sourced in Somaliland. It now makes sense to me why it’s a more expensive oil. For one, the resin is found in a tree that can only grow within an ecosystem and can’t grow alone. It needs other trees and vegetation to thrive. If it’s overharvested, it causes damage to the tree, compromising the future reproduction of the tree within the ecosystem.

I learned how farmers in decades past worked with oil “middle men” who offered substandard wages for their product. They felt so much pressure to produce mass quantities of resin and worried little about the quality of the tree they left behind for future harvests. It was the only way they’d ever known. Until dōTERRA swooped in and cut out the middle man. Upped the wages for the farmers significantly. Started to notice holes in their communities and began to rebuild their lives in unimaginable ways.

Clan elders became unified, for the first time in history. Sustainability improved, as did prosperity. Which is why dōTERRA  continues to source the most coveted, unadulterated and pure Frankincense oil the world of essential oils has ever seen.

dōTERRA is a heart-centric company.  That became evident this week. And you won’t find an oil more pure. (Try me. I will send a sample of your choice out tomorrow if you don’t believe me.)

Which leads me to…THESE NEW PRODUCTS!

Can I just say, that in effort to fit everything into my suitcase, I made the (seemingly smart) decision to unpack all of my beautiful convention kit items from my beautiful convention kit box. Had I kept said box, I would have taken a picture of everything for you. But instead, I tucked each of the items away in my suitcase.

Since we’re boxless, here is a quick snapshot of all my new goodies: As you can see, they haven’t gotten very far out of arms reach since I unpacked them…I am in love with these oils!

Even my sweet hubby this morning, who has never asked for oils first thing in the morning, asked for the Rose oil this morning. He woke up yesterday with what appears to be a spider/insect bite of some sort. It was my first thought to grab Rose when he told me about it. Incredible immune support, natural way to reduce inflammation and since it supports healthy, rejuvenated nerves, it can boost them up to an inch per month inside the body! He reported minimal itching and discomfort throughout the day, so it helped him for sure. Not to mention, this powerhouse mother of oils gives the kiddos a great boost in learning ability if applied first thing in the morning before school! Sadler especially enjoyed having Rose oil applied to the back of her neck in her Beauty and the Beast shirt today. And I have definitely found the winner of MY FAVORITE SMELLING OIL. Y’all. Goodness gracious, this Rose oik smells so beautiful. The whole family has legit fallen in love with it!

dōTERRA has sourced Rose oil for a while now, but normally only offered it as a special product. To know that it’s permanent as a 10 mL Touch roller is just too much to handle.

By the way, it takes about 8,000 roses to make a single 5 mL bottle of Rose oil. Because there is so much plant material required to distill a pure, therapeutic grade essential oil from these delicate petals, its naturally a pricier oil. Now I see why it’s dubbed “The Queen of Oils”. It even smells regal.

In the floral family, we also added Jasmine and Neroli. (These three touch rollers will become the Queen Bs for sure). The precious Neroli petal has been used as headpiece adornments on wedding days for centuries around the world, particularly in Egypt. Neroli oil stimulates GABA, and decreases excitatory brain signals. It reduces cortisol, which in turn reduces stress. And anxiety. I was happy to learn that this particular oil can be (and is recommended) during late stages of pregnancy to improve hormones, and even help with feelings of intimacy. Cell death is encouraged with the use of this essential oil, and did I mention it smells much different than rose? Pleasant smell, yes. But not rose, at all.

Jasmine, on the other hand. I can’t seem to get enough of this one. Emotionally, it associates with feeling liberated and FREE. Euphoria. Splendor. Joy. It’s been known to promote healthy blood pressure levels, likely due to presence of Limonene. And, like Neroli, it’s safe and recommended during labor. Soft massages promote relaxation during times of PMS and labor pains.  I cannot wait to try out both on some new mamas in the future! I start doula certification with The Labor Ladies in October and couldn’t be happier about it!

Oh, and in case you don’t know (I didn’t know)…1 drop of an essential oil affects 6.1 million molecules within your cells. Your entire body can be effected within a matter of  minutes if you use just a single drop of oil.

Diluting them is actual better than just applying more drops. Less is more with these oils. And a little definitely goes a long way. Diluting the essential oil with a medium sized carrier oil like fractionated coconut oil (either blended or layered) helps trap the volatile compounds, which minimize evaporation and enhance the penetration into the skin’s surface. Using your oils this way will give you a slower absorption rate overall, but the end result will be more effective.

Sorry, I digress…back to new oils.

Copaiba. Pronounced co-pie-EE-ba. And a unique oil it is. In the family of cannibinoids, this oil is effective because of it’s high level of beta-caryophyllene (BCP). It packs about 60% BCP, compared to just 21% in Black Pepper oil. So, what does that mean exactly?

Our Endocannabinoid System in our body is home to CB1 receptors (concentrated in the brain and central nervous system) and CB2 receptors (concentrated in the immune and endocrine systems).

Plants provide us with 3 different types of cannibinoids:

CannaBidiol, or CBD oil as you may have heard it called. It doesn’t directly impact either receptor.

TetraHydroCannabinol, or THC. Obviously poses a legal challenge as cannabis is currently illegal in many states. It does directly impact both the CB1 and CB2 receptors, thus giving a “high” sensation to both the mind and body. THC offers incredible therapeutic benefits to the whole body and has been used as medicine for centuries.

BetaCaryoPhyllene, or BCP, however…it directly impacts CB2 receptors, but does not interact with the CB1 receptors. Therefore, the body gains full therapeutic benefit but the mind remains unaffected. So, all of the same benefits from other cannibinoids, minus the hallucinogenic effect.

It will offer incredible support to the liver, as its a great antioxidant for the body. Cardiovascular health will be supported, as will the digestive system, respiratory system and immune system. Heavy, heavy hitter for sure.

This oil will become popular very quickly I think. I’ve already used it by adding a few drops to my water, and even to my coffee. Very calming to the body and has helped me relax and stay calm. The last few days have been recovery days for sure. Back in the saddle of life, adjusting to the new normal of life with a Kindergartener. I actually added a drop to her water bottle today…shhh! If I tell her, she won’t drink it!

Next up is Blue Tansy. And yes, it stains your hand when you use it. So I recommend diluting. It will eventually evaporate off if you don’t dilute (I’ve  used it at least 3 times already and been fine). But, it offers a very nice warming sensation similar to White Fir. I can see it pairing up well with Lemongrass in a roller for pain after exercise.

Aromatically, this one will be great to diffuse to uplift the mood. For the skin, combine it with Cedarwood or Frankincense to get a little more vitality in your face and neck.

The On Guard sanitizer spray is nice, and I’ve already used it on the kids and on my yoga mat. I’ve been making a version of this myself for a year or so now, it’s nice to see one available for less than $7.

And last, but most certainly not least in the world of all things certain…THE YOGA COLLECTION.

“The body achieves what the mind believes.”

Three NEW blends, each designed with the yogi in mind.

Anchor, The Grounding Blend: Lavender, Cedarwood, Frankincense, Cinnamon, Sandalwood, Black Pepper, Patchouli, FCO. I applied to the bottom of my skull at the back of my neck, and behind my ears in the soft spot under the lobe.

Align, The Centering Blend: Bergamot, Coriander, Margoram, Peppermint, Geranium, BAsil, Rose, Jasmine, FCO. I applied this one directly over my heart.

Arise, The Uplifting Blend. MY FAVORITE. Lemon, Grapefruit, Siberian Fir, Osmanthus, Melissa, FCO. I’ve been diffusing this one on my necklace, and before yoga I applied it to the center of my forehead.

These three blends are each powerful and speak to me in their own way. I cannot wait to use them daily for meditation and my yoga practice. And to share them with others!

One of my favorite takeaways from convention comes from dōTERRA founding executive Emily Wright:

Man cannot improve upon what nature creates so beautifully.

If you didn’t know, dōTERRA means “gift of the Earth”. Let me show you how precious these gifts really are. It would be my honor to help you start your journey. There is much to be gained from starting a journey with dōTERRA: health and wellness improvements in a natural and holistic way, much gentler than what we’ve been accustomed to in the past; financial freedom, simply by sharing these gifts with those you love; empowerment through education and resources.

Your mind, body and spirit will thank you for taking a first step.

 

Balance.

Day four of Kindergarten is in the books. Sadler couldn’t be happier right now in these moments of her life.

 I’ve had all the feels this week about this whole starting school thing.

Filling out the form, using only 5 words to describe my only 5-year-old…my baby. I had never truly thought of words to describe her before. Just last week as we rode in the car, Reid and I gave our input on who we saw our daughter to be; I was filling in her name, and her strengths and weaknesses, and her “hot buttons”. It was heartwarming to come up with the best five words that we thought described our girl, together: STRONG-WILLED, KIND, TENDERHEARTED, LEADER, INTELLIGENT.

As I wrote the words in the paper, I began to cry. Who were we talking about here? Sadler, or me?

It’s so hard as a parent (at least for me at this place in my journey) when you see things in your children, qualities about them, similarities in their behavior, predictability in how they’ll answer questions…and you feel like you’re looking in the mirror.

I’ve coming to learn and accept that I am my own best teacher, but this little girl runs a real tight second. She teaches me things about myself, and I try to teach her things about herself because I just know how she sees life. Sometimes it’s as if we share the same eyes.

She speaks my language. She gets me and I get her. I feel so incredibly lucky that she is mine. 

But I want her to find her way in her way. I don’t ever want to be a tug of influence, but rather a beam of guidance that just leads her there, on her own.

She’s a 1. I’m a 1, too. 

So I know for her, it can seem like we are the only ones with the only way. Our hearts are protected yet open, and our ideas are bigger than us it seems. Yet we know we can always push harder. 

It’s been a struggle this week. Finding balance between being a good stay-at-home-mom and a servant leader/CEO to my newly-blossoming essential oil business. Can’t I do both?

Time-blocking. When I have (let’s be real, when I make) the time to actually block the time. It happens sometimes. We’ll call it 50 percent.

Meditating (actually just discovered Light Sourcing by Rebecca Campbell in her INCREDIBLE BOOK, “Light is the New Black”). My mornings have become my favorite time of the day for more reasons than this one. 

Hot yoga when I have someone to watch the girls (aka – when Reid gets home from work or really early on Saturday mornings). I’d go every single day if it were possible. It’s my sanctuary. 

  Lots of oils. I love and find comfort in knowing than whenever things get heavy, I can count on my oils for safety and solace. They usually change the game for me so profoundly that I’m moved to tell someone or make a Facebook live video about my experience. 

Affirmations. Written on a whiteboard, to be repeated each morning. Out loud. Because I know the power of the spoken word. 

Lots of deep personal development through books. Mindset transformations about money and budgeting.  Journaling.

I’m doing so many of the things. I’ve created so many positive habits. Yet, I still find myself feeling out of balance. 

Unsteady. Ungrounded. 

Flailing. 

I’m learning to soften into who I am. We all need to. 

I’m so worried about getting it all done that I can’t lose sight of what I’m doing it all for. 

I’ve prayed for answers for quite some time now. Shortly after (and sometimes during), I look up to see a squirrel balancing along the power line right in front of me. It’s like he comes out of thin air. I see that as God telling me to keep my footing, just one in front of the other. Slow and steady. 

Because as the old Chinese proverb goes, “Be not afraid of going slowly; be only afraid of standing still.”

24 Mondays

That’s how many I’ve had to rock you before nap. That’s how many I’ve had to hold you in the heirloom rocking chair in your bedroom, the place we’ve both come to know and love with such intimacy and sacred appreciation.

It’s how many Mondays I’ve had to notice that you like to grab hold of the sides of the rocking chair, one arm at a time, nice long stretches, while your head stays rested on my chest. How you love to hold onto my shoulder with only one arm, like a baby sloth, and you sleep with your mouth open and have a tiny growl of a snore.

It’s how many Mondays I’ve had to feel an inching wonder that you may never stop breastfeeding, and while I appreciate the bond and beauty and all that breastfeeding does for our soul and the souls of mamas and babies all over the world…believe me, I’m so grateful. But I’m ready for it to end.

But then…I can’t help but think that in 24 Mondays from now, you probably won’t want to nurse anymore. You may not even want me to rock you, and who knows if you will even want to be held at all. How many words will you say then? You’ll have a new thing that you do, and a new preference about you. Will you still call it “bbubbbbll” and like to be patted on the butt to be soothed? Will you want to play with your sister, or find solitary adventure without her?

All these things that I think won’t ever stop, they will. That’s just the thing.

And I will miss them.

I’ve come to realize that you’re likely the last one, Everly Jean. The last baby to be birthed and rocked and swaddled and breastfed. The last one. They saved the best for last with you. You’re good, you. Mama loves you, more than you may ever truly know.

I’ve watched you change other people, too. Strangers sometimes. Often times. They connect eyes with you and you give them that toothy smile and your eyes light up like Mama Dot. They see you like I see you.

Life is teaching me that finding gratitude for what shows up in my path, that’s true beauty. That my purpose right now is to be a mother, and to be there for you and your sister when you need me. To teach you to appreciate what you’ve got in life, to be kind to every single person you meet, and to love with all that you’re made of.

Raising and growing you into the lady version of yourself so that you, too can be a mama and a light for your own girls some day.

Knowing that a day will come when you won’t need me at all anymore and I will be lucky if you call me before bedtime each night when you’re all grown up.

All the growth and digging deep in self-discovery over the last year of my life seems to run parallel to your existence. You are wondrous to me, and I may never be able to find the right words to tell you exactly what you are to me. My hope is, that you’ll just see and know like the world sees you.

Perfect wonder, you are, Everly Jean.


I look forward to 24 more Mondays with you, that lead to Fridays and weekends where Sunday seems to drag out forever. Those are our favorite days.

I’ll try to stop rushing you to grow up now. Sleep well, our princess. Mama loves you.

 


 

In Case You’ve Wondered What It’s Like

Guilt. There’s been a lot of that.

Because I underestimated what it would be like to be at home. There have been fewer showers, less projects and more chores. There have been days when I feel like I’m on top of the world, and days when I cry for hours and wonder when I will get a break and feel sane again.

I sometimes eat dinner in the bathroom while watching my kids play in the bath tub, and my house isn’t nearly as clean as I thought it would be.

I completely took for granted the 40-hour break I got from being a mom each week. Not that my  mom-worries and responsibilities stopped when I went to work, but shifting my responsibility to something else for eight hours a day was a break. And I didn’t ever think so at the time.

I underestimated the value of a lot of the relationships I had with my co-workers, and I’ve realized that I wasn’t a very good boss or friend at work. I couldn’t have been. I was trying to do it all by myself, and had lost faith in God and I too often let my stress get to me. I always seemed annoyed and no one ever seemed to need me at a time that was convenient for me. I was so buried in tasks and the desire to perform. I cared deeply about always doing the right thing and being good for everyone, but I wasn’t good for myself. I am thankful for this awareness now and look forward to continuing to nurture the relationships I had through work that I know were real.

I miss interacting with adults all day and I miss taking a lunch break. I miss holding team meetings and watching my maintenance guys roll their eyes because I asked them to hang a sign.

There are days when my mind surges with ideas for my new business and all I want is eight hours to sit at a desk and my laptop and colorful pens and planners and a good playlist. I’d even take four hours. I just miss the grind of getting stuff done. Having a perpetual to-do list that carries over from one day to the next makes you feel like you’re digging holes on the beach. The wave comes, and fills up your hole and you have to dig again. And then more waves.

So, I savor nap time and all that I’m able to accomplish (like this blog post), but I feel guilty for telling Sadler she can watch TV while I work.

I’ve moved on to living life in my favorite robe and yoga pants, spending most of my day in the kitchen and building a rock star essential  oil business. I’ve gotten to spend more time with my Granny over the last three months than I’ve spent with her in the last 10 years. I’ve cancelled cable, sold my dream car, paid off debt, started this blog, read at least a dozen books and made lasting new friendships.

I’m grateful for all the naps I’ve been able to rock Everly before, and all the times I’ve been able to say Hi to the mailman.

I know that being needed all of the time may seem heavy and hard, because it is. But I’m thankful for the time I’ve learned to make for myself and appreciate each minute more than ever before. I’m learning to let the guilt of it all go, because I feel in my bones that I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be, doing exactly what I’m supposed to be doing. And doing it with dirty hair and yoga pants makes it just that much more fun.

I know how the lotus flower grows…

 

 

 

Reflections: A Season Ends

I had a really close friend in college tell me out of the blue that we couldn’t be friends anymore. She just stopped hanging out with me. I remember feeling super-confused and I asked another friend if he knew what happened to make her stop wanting to hang out. He said, “You were just too much for her to handle”…

My journey as an at-home mama began at the end of winter. Spring came in, a fresh breeze of light and momentum. Now it’s nearing an end, and summer starts next week. A new season, a new set of goals and a new wave of life and adventure.

I’m learning to accept that people come into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. They may float in and it feels as if they’ve been in the room all along. Like a feather. (I saw a feather on the beach just last weekend. It reminded me of the down pillows on Mama Dot’s bed and it made me smile/cry a tiny tear.)

Some people leave suddenly like my college friend, and we can’t help but wonder what we did to suddenly shift things so unexpectedly.

But then sometimes, we are blessed with people who land on our path at just at the right time. We instantly feel warm and we know we will love them forever.

I see life differently now.

Do you remember those books we used to color in as a kid? The ones where the pages were black and white drawings with tiny boxes within the drawing, like a big puzzle… and there was a number in the box and you filled in the boxes according to the little legend at the bottom of the page? Well, now when I look at those pages, all of my tiny boxes are filled in with color. All of the drawings are colored in in beautiful colors. It’s the same book, but I see all the colors. I now get the joy of adding glitter to the pages.

I’ve learned that being misunderstood is one of the most painful experiences as a human. Or, at least for me as a human. I can be seen by many as a punch in the face, packed into a pill form, immediately followed by a smile and a hug. But what I’m learning is that we all see differently, through different lenses. And I’m just not seen by everyone. And I can’t change that. I have a big heart and a strong passion to help others find the light within them. I’ve been called to help others see what I now see.

I’ve felt my friendships shift over the recent weeks, as the season has shifted into summer. I feel the energy moving around my circles and feel the different bonds forming as weekends and fireside nights turn to beach memories and family time at the park. I feel some drifting away as some are drawing closer. I welcome and appreciate the joy I feel in my life every day and am thankful for the people who have allowed me into their space. If you’ve been in mine, I can assure you it was a pure joy for me. I savor every bit of time I have to give love to others and am humbled by what this season has done for me as a person, a mother, a wife, a friend, a business leader.

The light within me sees and honors the light within you.

I look forward to summer. More time in the sun, more time in the sand, more time in the hammock, more burgers on the grill, more deep talks on the back patio. I look forward to pool days and spending time with some of my sweet mama friends around the baby pool.

I am thankful for what spring cultivated in my life. It’s incredibly beautiful to watch growth through nurturing and a little love and attention. Grace gets us far, I’m learning. God is so big and great and good.

 

It Always was WAHM

 

This has been my view lately. It’s what I see when I look out the back window of my house. In front of this window sits a tall kitchen table with lots of chairs. It’s where I sit (and stand) a lot of the day. It’s where I work.

It was February 1st of this year, and it was the very first day that I was at home in my “new life”. On this day, I recall thinking to myself…”I’m never going to think or say the words: I have to go to work again today/tomorrow…“. I even recall telling my husband about this thought I had. I told him that I was going to make it my goal to never utter those words again. I recall him smirking and saying, “OK babe.”  In my heart, these words meant so much more to me than they may seem to you reading them now, or to my husband when he heard them initially. I had felt a shift within myself and knew that I was going to find a way to contribute to our family without ever working outside of the home again.

It was merely a few days later, I was standing in the laundry room listening to my thoughts race back and forth in my head between ideas I’d pondered on ways to work from home. My heart was heavy. I’d been praying about it. Reid and I had been fighting about it. Quitting my job – my CAREER in property management that had provided so many blessings for us over the last decade – was a BIG DEAL. And while my heart may have felt that there was a plan, putting that plan into motion seemed like a more daunting task than I had realized.

But as I stood there, and continued to pull each piece of clothing out of the dryer one-by-one, it was as if the Holy Spirit spoke to me and said, Candice, turn your head to the left”.

On the countertop to my left sat my wooden box of essential oils. Our families medicine cabinet. My reliable emotional health regimen. My daily go-to for at least 5 different reasons for myself or someone in this house.

I remember throwing my head back and literally laughing out loud when this happened. “Really, Lord?!” I cried! Something that had been right at my fingertips every. single. day. for the last two years was now the vehicle to bring income to my family.

What does the word “work” really mean to us anyway? The way I see it, we work to make money. Right?!

So, what if I could make money a non-traditional way? A way in which I never had to “go to work” again, or at least it would never feel that way. And then I read a story about a man:

There once was a man who hauled buckets of water for a living. His job was to haul water every day from the nearest water source, back to his village. Because everyone needed water, he always sold out. If he wanted to make more money, he simply hauled more buckets of water.

After many years of hauling these buckets of water, the man grew tired. Then he had an idea and inspiration! He decided to use his spare time to build a pipeline, so that eventually he could be free of hauling buckets of water, yet still provide water to the people of his village. So, he worked very hard over the next few years to build his pipeline.

The day the man turned on his water spigot, everything changed. He had successfully created an unlimited supply of water for the villagers and himself, resulting in an abundant financial pipeline.

I never knew anything about network marketing. Like most people, I had my own narrow thoughts about what it really was and how it really worked. Prior to this year, I didn’t really care to know about it. I had used the products for the last couple of years and found  myself sharing with friends and loved ones naturally. However, I never had an interest in the business side of the company. I then read one book and that was all it took for me to see the vision.

It also hasn’t taken me very long to see that the business venture I’ve launched into is really a personal development company disguised as an essential oil company.

Over the last ninety days, I have grown exponentially as a person.

I have found support in some incredible people who are walking this same  journey with me.

I have had the beautiful pleasure of helping other people get started on this very same journey. While their pace may be different or their approach unique to my own, the journey is theirs – and I get to be a part in helping them reach their goals.

I have found a way to utilize all of the business skills I acquired and sharpened over the past decade in order to propel my business forward.

Reading this book opened my eyes to living on purpose and gave me a powerful inspiring approach to managing all of the goals in my life and has made them more attainable and the reward seem more gratifying.

I’ve also learned that at an early age, we give ourselves limiting beliefs on what we should do and feel and think and say. By doing this, we have fears that we may never breakthrough. Reading this book has been an eye-opening way to change this mindset altogether for me personally, and has taught me to face my fears head on and then to watch them dissipate.

I have taken a deep dive in, head first and will never look back.

If you find yourself feeling as if you are just going through the motions in your life, you probably are.

If you stare at the ceiling at night thinking that there has got to be a better way to live life, there definitely is.

We were all put on this Earth to do something more than just pay bills.

Life is meant to be LIVED. We should not have to haul buckets for hours upon days upon weeks upon years.

Time is not something meant to hold us captive by all that we “have to do”. Time is actually in abundance if you can learn to shift your mindset about what’s actually important to you. Only then will you see that time is a gift, not a limitation.

I look forward to life now more so than ever. I truly welcome each day as a new gift from God and am so thankful to be able to carry out the plans He has in store for me. My heart remains full so that I may pour into others.

I went from working 40-50 hours a week outside of the home to working about 15 hours per week inside the home and am on a path to replace the income I once earned by the Fall of this year. This opportunity has proved itself to be very real and for once in my life, there is no stress associated with my “job”. It feels weird even calling what I do now a “job” because it just doesn’t feel like work. It just doesn’t.

I don’t sell essential oils. I share and educate others.

I don’t have essential oil parties. I teach essential oil classes.

This is not my hobby. This is my business.

I’m busy building a pipeline for my family so that someday, the mental shift will have come full circle — and we can pack up and vacation for three weeks if we feel like it. And we won’t have any debt left to pay. And we won’t feel like prisoners of time to the demands of the institutionalized world we feel so vacuumed into today.

I have a personal goal to lead a team of 1,000 people to take charge of their own health and wellness. I will achieve this goal by teaching anyone I can about the endless benefits these gifts of the Earth offer.

Who do you know that can help me reach this goal?…